tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2008://8 2008-10-09T16:18:10Z Movable Type 3.36 tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5279 2006-12-20T17:07:32Z 2008-10-09T16:18:10Z

You can watch new episodes of my gutter chat show Smoke Break every Wednesday at the Metro Times Music Blahg. But you can also bookmark this YouTube site for an archive of all episodes. Smoke Break: All Talk, No Action....

Johnny Loftus Metro Times Music Blahg. But you can also bookmark this YouTube site for an archive of all episodes. Smoke Break: All Talk, No Action. JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5278 2006-11-08T20:30:25Z 2008-10-08T21:10:58Z

Check out this week's Metro Times. It's my first Music Issue as music editor, and includes stories on Great Lakes Myth Society and John Speck of The Fags, as well as a bunch of Detroit music reviewed. All in all...

Johnny Loftus Check out this week's Metro Times. It's my first Music Issue as music editor, and includes stories on Great Lakes Myth Society and John Speck of The Fags, as well as a bunch of Detroit music reviewed. All in all I think it went pretty well. Plus, check out the Music Blahg for the first installment of "Smoke Break," where Brian Smith and I chat no-fi about whatever we want, live from the St. Antoine gutter. JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5277 2006-11-08T20:21:29Z 2008-10-08T21:10:58Z

From my Google Chat program. See below. My Pal Rob T. and I, inspired by Rumsfeld's retirement. Dude can't leave our pop culture radar; please, not yet. (He can leave the gov't, though; we have no problem with that.) As...

Johnny Loftus Rob T. and I, inspired by Rumsfeld's retirement. Dude can't leave our pop culture radar; please, not yet. (He can leave the gov't, though; we have no problem with that.) As Rob says below, Rummy is one of the modern era's finest existential poets. WWRD? Well, Rob and I offer a few suggestions, from starring in the "Surreal Life" to overtaking some of our most obvs blogs. A few detours into cable news election coverage, too. Read on... rob: this day could possibly not get any better 1:49 PM me: I vote Rummy for "Surreal Life 2007" rob: nope. he's going to go play golf with satan. 1:50 PM me: I say he starts a podcast where he delivers all his thoughts on celebrity in 2006. rob: hahahahhaaha me: Defamer? no - Rummyfied. rob: DataRum me: Motor City Rum rob: Rumevs me: Stereofeld rob: Music For Rumsfelds 1:51 PM me: Pitchfeld Rumsfork me: Skeet on Rumsfeld rob: fuck Fluxfeld me: Perfect Feld for Rumsever 1:52 PM rob: Rummyism me: Rumsfeldian Apparel rob: McRummy's me: Best Rumsfeld Ever rob: Donaldcrombie and Rummy me: Rummy is the new blog 1:53 PM Last Night's Rumsfeld rob: Donald Rumfseld is Overrated Donaldist me: The Cobrafeld rob: DeadDon 1:54 PM Melody Rumsfeld.com me: Miss Modernrums rob: Seven Inches of Rumsfeld me: Luke Walton's Rumsfeld rob: Donald Are Pretty 1:55 PM me: Gurgling Rummy rob: Donaldesko Largehearted Don me: Access Rumsfeld rob: what say Fox and Friends retool and have Pat O Brien, Ted Haggar d and Rummy as hosts? that'd be a hell of a morning show. 1:56 PM me: Dude, Rummy as a host would fucking rule. It'd be like McLaughlin Group in the heyday. ISSUE TWO! Did you see Kondrake and Barnes hemming and hawing all over Fox News last night? rob: oh yeah. I enjoyed the Brit Hume waffling and gurgling more than some of the results those baritone "errr,,uhhh" me: Hume. Such a horse face. 1:57 PM rob: he looks like one of those cartoon dogs that always had the barrel around their necks me: And they had that crazy map that looked like Cosmic Ark rob: like his skin is about to slide off the bone any minute me: With the boxes moving around all over it. rob: did you watch any of olbermann having fun? 1:58 PM me: Yeah he was pretty great, but I find him insufferable after awhile. And I always resort to SportsCenter jokes. I'd like to see a knife fight between Olbs, Patrick, and Craig Kilborn. rob: that'd be great to hear after Rummy's resignation speech. That famliar "DAH-nah-NAH...DAH-nah-NAH" rob: i went to cracker barrell for lunch me: Was Chris Rock's mom there? rob: i went to cracker barrel and apparently there's a new format of music called "positive alternative" you heard of it? me: Yeah, it's like Hot AC for Christians. Jars of Clay rob: at first i was like "cool. new andrew wk record. but it's weird nickelback sounding shit for christians" me: New Newsboys tries to cash on it, too. Jeremy Camp's another big one. rob: so it's just clear channel selling CCM a new way? me: Yep. rob: maybe that's what rummy can do next. crank out some CCM jams with TobyMac for the troops sort of like a breakdown in songs ala vincent price in "thriller" me: Rowdy Roddy Rummy 2:04 PM rob: Donald The Giant me: Hacksaw Don Rumsfeld. rob: Junkyard Don me: The Feldsdertaker rob: Koko B. Rumsfeld 2:05 PM me: Supereld Snuka rob: Donald "The Brain" Heenan me: Karl Rove and Rums as the British Bulldogs. Bush is Stephanie. rob: You think Rove's gonna resign next? 2:06 PM me: No fucking way. rob: he COULD yknow. he's gotta retool the party for 08 who else can do that? ed gillespie? ken mehlman? dick "seven nation" armey? 2:07 PM me: Armey was making the rounds of cable news last night and sounded like a confused old man sending soup back in a deli. "Answer that phone!" two Seinfeld refs in one chat post. rob: Ron Popeil? Rumsfeld signs on as new spokesperson for RonCO me: Rumsfeld slipped in Snapple once. He broke his hip. rob: "there are products we know and products we don't know" me: I predict a "Chuck Norris" string of Rumsfeld jokes. 2:09 PM rob: oh of course. there has to be some sort of fitting tribute to this century's greatest existential poet me: Word to that. Cantankerous motherfuckers unite. TEAM RUMMY. (As long as he's nowhere near the guv.) JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5276 2006-09-27T19:24:53Z 2008-10-08T21:10:58Z

"A Different Kind of Tension: Trajectory, meaning and discovery in Detroit's noise music scene": Noise music gets a bad rap as being too volatile and oppressive. It's often maligned as an out-there genre pursued only by those lost souls...

Johnny Loftus "A Different Kind of Tension: Trajectory, meaning and discovery in Detroit's noise music scene": Noise music gets a bad rap as being too volatile and oppressive. It's often maligned as an out-there genre pursued only by those lost souls who've completely forsaken conventional rock 'n' roll in favor of routinely locking their heads inside an autoclave, or envisioned as some horrible, scary cauldron that boils with the bloody discharge of 10,000 ruptured eardrums. Lou Reed can probably be blamed for some of that. In 1975 he released Metal Machine Music, a clanging run-on sentence of feedback that can still trigger mortal thoughts if listened to in its entirety. But while the noise scene definitely has its proponents of the extreme — Japanese noise legend Merzbow has never issued anything that wasn't singularly focused on destroying your senses — that doesn't mean there's only darkness at its core, or that all noise is meant to breed fear alone. It might not ever be warm and fuzzy, and what's at its core can be mysterious. But noise can definitely excite on a visceral level, and lately it's been offering some of the most creative music in Detroit. Obscura from the fringe of modern music? Only for those that haven't discovered it yet. ............... PLUS: Check out the Noise Toolkit on the Music Blahg. ............... JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5275 2006-08-23T18:24:05Z 2008-10-08T21:10:57Z

I've started a blog off Metro Times' Web site; it's called the Music Blahg and will feature content additional to MT's regular music section, as well as stuff that in the past you might have read as leads or blurbs...

Johnny Loftus The Music Blahg Read about it in today's issue: "Blah Blah Blahg" There are also some reviews today: Deadsy, Phantasmagore (Archives: "Deadsy Poets Society," Glorious Noise, 6/14/2002) V/A, Rogue’s Gallery: Pirate Ballads, Sea Songs & Chanteys ................. There is no smoke in the sky over those trees. JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5274 2006-08-18T14:48:16Z 2008-10-08T21:10:57Z

Everything is making me thirsty. Bittersweet Symphony - J Dilla's final word is too profound for just one review "It sounds unfinished, and I guess that's the saddest thing. You get engrossed in the brassy, funky "Love Jones" and then...

Johnny Loftus Bittersweet Symphony - J Dilla's final word is too profound for just one review "It sounds unfinished, and I guess that's the saddest thing. You get engrossed in the brassy, funky "Love Jones" and then it's over, a minute of inspiration left looking for an emcee." In the Flesh: Fiona Apple, Aug. 9, 2006, State Theatre, Detroit "Voyeuristic is right on, particularly because she doesn't hesitate to writhe. I couldn't help but smirk a little at times, because we've been conditioned to think that, when performers make moves like that, they're usually the goofy theater-major performance-art types. You know —"I'm so into this, watch me urinate on my shoe and dance a jig." But with Fiona I felt like that's truly her live style, and she doesn't give a shit — or maybe even know — what people think of it." Scavenger Quartet - We Live on Land (Acidsoxx) "[Scavenger Quartet] are interested in the shifty place where instruments meet what were formerly non-instruments; they like to exist between description." ............... JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5273 2006-08-09T19:55:35Z 2008-10-08T21:10:57Z

I'm really angry that road construction prevented my catching Sleater-Kinney's set at Lollapalooza '06 ("Lolla Lolla Lollapalooza, Please - The crapness, the greatness, and the hammered, ball-grabbing Wolfmotherness of it all" ). They're such a great band, and I think...

Johnny Loftus Sleater-Kinney's set at Lollapalooza '06 ("Lolla Lolla Lollapalooza, Please - The crapness, the greatness, and the hammered, ball-grabbing Wolfmotherness of it all" ). They're such a great band, and I think it's really a shame that their pet issues or the fact that they're women too often overshadow how sick-awesome of songwriters and performers they really are. In my Lollapalooza recap I give props to Queens of the Stone Age, who surprised me with (at least half) a set of truly powerful, even scary rock 'n' roll. I honestly didn't think that much of them before their set. But if I had been able to catch S-K, I know they would've gotten the nod for sheer badasness over QOTSA. I just looked at their Web site, and it seems the final Sleater-Kinney shows ever will take place this weekend in Portland. According to Travelocity it would cost me $660 to fly there. That's about $546 more than I have to spend. Well, I'm sure it's sold out, anyway. So at this point all I have to look forward to are the S-K vet solo projects. I hope Carrie Brownstein starts a band with Joe Lally and Brendan Canty. ................... A Pop Cherub Gets His Wings From Snowhite to Love Arcade, this singer's confidence is flying "It's time for him to go. The sun has shifted, and it's threatening the porcelain sheen of his complexion. Christian has bigger things to worry about — like Love Arcade's upcoming tour and promoting a record that's so clean and tidy it burps like Rubbermaid. But he probably isn't worrying about those things." ....................... Keep it bustin' like a bubble. JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5272 2006-07-26T20:24:39Z 2008-10-08T21:10:57Z

Shellac is touring this August and September, which is cool. I hope Weston does a question and answer session, and that everyone wears grey coveralls. But wait a minute, no Detroit date? And instead of a Detroit date, there's a...

Johnny Loftus Shellac is touring this August and September, which is cool. I hope Weston does a question and answer session, and that everyone wears grey coveralls. But wait a minute, no Detroit date? And instead of a Detroit date, there's a show scheduled for Grand Rapids? It's at a place that didn't exist when I lived in Grand Rapids. But I wish I could say it was happening at The Reptile House. Shellac would just seem to fit in such a place, with the Skull beer and grimy vinyl. (Pants, not records.) ............................. Who doesn't love Journey? "From “Open Arms” to “Faithfully,” it was as if the switch everyone has nowadays, that switch that turns off empathy, community, or even humanity in a rabid quest for self-preservation, suddenly shorted out." .......... Marvelous one? Butch Walker mines the niche between celebrity, cynic, and songwriter "Today Walker exists in two worlds. He's a well-paid hired gun, having recently signed on to co-write and produce whatever results from the icky four-way marriage of a reality contestant vocalist to Tommy Lee, Jason Newstead and Gilby Clarke on CBS' midsummer laugher Rock Star: Supernova. But he's also released his third solo album, and it represents again his ability to write durable, personal pop songs that also knowingly skewer the glam bubbles of Hollywood, celebrity and the music industry." ................... Hold on to that fee-ye-ye-yeel-eel-ling. JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5271 2006-07-20T16:21:16Z 2008-10-08T21:10:57Z

The new wristband: W.W.DMX.D? The networks are dead to us this summer, each of them preoccupied with "America's Got....A Serious Dearth of Talent"-type embarrasments. So it's up to basic cable to save prime time, and it's coming through. Best by...

Johnny Loftus Soul of a Man," a "reality" show that follows around lye-throated MC DMX. Anyone who's followed his career since It's Dark and Hell is Hot knows that one of X's biggest accomplishments has been his crafting of a direct and unavoidable persona, a stance as the conflicted shadow that stands between light and dark, heaven and earth, the streets and the penthouse. That persona appears here and there in "Soul of a Man," usually when X is meting out threats on hentchmen and the like. But what makes the show so watchable is how it dismantles the legend the man has built. X becomes a volatile but regular guy with a punctuality problem (and very possibly severe ADD) who drives all the people in his life - his management, his label, his wife - bananas as they try to reign him in. But he doesn't want to be reigned in. He just wants to go target-shooting in the Arizona desert. Or at the very least be at the Gas 'N' Sip just as the fresh donuts arrive. "Soul of a Man" is event television not because of the crazed DMX-ocity that constantly burbles just off-camera, though that's highly watchable, too. It's important because it succeeds at humanizing its subject, instead of letting him hang himself with his own hijinks (as most reality programming would.) .................... Unfakeable How Julie Roberts floats above the pop-country fluff "[Roberts makes Men & Mascara's] title track even better than its already terrific central phrase — "'Cause men and mascara always run" — because she delivers it with a wink and a rueful sigh, like she's resigned herself to the fact men will be idiots for as long as beauty maintenance is a chore." ..................... JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5270 2006-07-14T18:44:05Z 2008-10-08T21:10:57Z

From the record company boilerplate: "Enter 2006 and Deadsy returns with their signature sound, termed 'undercore,' yet has taken their musical odyssey to another level. Their ability to create a perfect dichotomy between eerie and beautiful is most apparent on...

Johnny Loftus Deadsy returns with their signature sound, termed 'undercore,' yet has taken their musical odyssey to another level. Their ability to create a perfect dichotomy between eerie and beautiful is most apparent on PHANTASMAGORE, with its grinding guitars, dense synth and distortion, coupled with beautiful melodies and undeniable hooks. Taking cues from pop culture as much as the metaphysical, whether referencing Velvet Underground or Stanley Kubrick, science or sci-fi, Deadsy's existence straddles a dual reality. Enamored by all things visual and incorporating its ideology into each facet of performance, Deadsy's live shows are unprecedented. World domination to begin shortly." That's some goofy smoked glass hyperbole. But Deadsy is unquestionably top-shelf schlock. Commencement is still a classic, its privileged youths take on Korn and Blue Oyster Cult remaining weird and entertaining three years later. And now Deadsy's parlor act is back. Admit it! The warbling keys of "Better Than You Know" are your commander! The first row tears the Gog, alas, the sky falls...rain the angels. Memory Lane: Deadsy Poets Society - The Hammer of the Celebrity Gods Strikes Again "Deadsy sounds like The Grand Illusion at 78rpms, Daniel Ash fronting Children of Bodom, or the music that's made when the only guy in the band who has a truck/practice space/rich parents/extra girlfriends/________ happens to play a synthesizer and have an Aleister Crowley fixation." .................... The Future is Wow "[A] part-fantasy landscape of light-emitting diodes that spell out F-U-N in letters you can see from outer space." Pop Goes the World: Is Tally Hall ready for their closeup? .............. Hooray for the winners. JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5269 2006-07-09T19:49:58Z 2008-10-08T21:10:57Z

Timbaland's having the best summer ever. Nelly's "Promiscuous" owned the first part, with apologies to Shakira and 'Clef. But with Justin Timberlake's "SexyBack," Tim's gone essentially psycho. It's two parts played against each other like baying hounds on drugs, and...

Johnny Loftus Timbaland's having the best summer ever. Nelly's "Promiscuous" owned the first part, with apologies to Shakira and 'Clef. But with Justin Timberlake's "SexyBack," Tim's gone essentially psycho. It's two parts played against each other like baying hounds on drugs, and even manages to craft a new catchphrase as its hook. "I'm bringing Sexy back?" Who says that? I didnt even know it left. Regardless, it rules in this context. The production's gritty and weird like the best Timbaland, and JT's vocals are scuttled over with some kind of prickly mute - "SexyBack" sounds more like a chopped 'n' screwed version of Kelis put back on its right speed than it does Timberlake. JT, man. He did it right. Does anyone even remember that he was in NSYNC? That he fucked around with a triple double called Britney? That he was at the Super Bowl with Janet? Kid can do no wrong, and he's all the better for it. ..................... Potato Salad Surgery "Potato salad is the DJ of the American picnic. It really is. Think about it. It's gathered together from disparate sources like a remix for your tongue, it's a culinary cornerstone crucial to the outdoor chilling experience. And if potato salad's the DJ, then iced tea is the emcee, blankets are graffiti, and lawn sports are breakdancing. Hip hop's four elements meet their leisure-time mirrors." Dabrye, Two/Three "Two's collaborative spirit connects Dabrye's drowsy futurism with the anxious, street-specific aesthetic of Detroit hip hop." ......... JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5268 2006-06-15T19:54:39Z 2008-10-08T21:10:57Z

I've been listening to Cansei de Ser Sexy's Sub Pop debut again and again. I'm going to lobby the casino across the street from my office to broadcast it on their loudspeaker, so all the elderly folks waiting for tourbuses...

Johnny Loftus Cansei de Ser Sexy's Sub Pop debut again and again. I'm going to lobby the casino across the street from my office to broadcast it on their loudspeaker, so all the elderly folks waiting for tourbuses can hear it, too. But CSS are frightening, too. They're like a self-contained trend that hasn't blown up yet, only because it doesn't feel like it yet. They're like five Lily Allens plus a dude, and every single lyric is razor sharp. It's no longer cool to be an Internet sensation - just ask Avenue D. But Cansei de Ser Sexy seem like a new generation of that aesthetic - a group born from Beyoncé, crate-digging, Web cams and comment posts - "Would you like to see me do that? Would you? You do it first" - but also from the US's sudden realization that Brazil is where the real fun exists, because we all know it doesn't exist here anymore. They're the energy in Kristin Cavallari's smile, but also represent how instant, unattainable, haughty, and disorienting a phenomenon like Cavallari is. And this just makes their music more awesome. "2 girls and a cam! 3 girls and a cam! You put a dog there and you got Polaroid scat." - CSS's Lovefoxxx in "Artbitch" This shit's going to be huge; that's just the plain truth. .................... 89x's b-day soiree Summertime and the Music's Easy Prime Ministers, Budget Cuts]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5267 2006-05-31T15:48:53Z 2008-10-08T21:10:57Z

(Looking in rearview) "Too far?" (Nervous) "Yeah." (Nodding) "Sure." ................ Fela's Children - The rise of Afro-Beat from Nigerian roots to Detroit and your ringtone. ................ SSM - SSM (Alive) "The real thrill of SSM isn't in what it revives,...

Johnny Loftus Fela's Children - The rise of Afro-Beat from Nigerian roots to Detroit and your ringtone. ................ SSM - SSM (Alive) "The real thrill of SSM isn't in what it revives, but what it suggests about Detroit's rock future." ................ It's over now, but still: DEMF v.7: The Pax & the Hau of it. ................ Why don't you turn me loose? Turn me loose. Turn me loose. I gotta do it my way. I wanna fly. (Repeat.) Turn me loose. (Repeat.) ....................... JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5266 2006-05-11T19:34:32Z 2008-10-08T21:10:57Z

An update of recent stories and things from my work for Metro Times, for all you out-of-towners. I'm looking at you, Jack Lemmon. ........ Arena Rock: Behind the music with the Pistons audio knob-twiddler Steve Conway The Fantastic 4: Why...

Johnny Loftus Metro Times, for all you out-of-towners. I'm looking at you, Jack Lemmon. ........ Arena Rock: Behind the music with the Pistons audio knob-twiddler Steve Conway The Fantastic 4: Why the Black Eyed Peas are our new superheroes, like it or not Click here for a joke about John Corbett. (I cut the part about Isuzu voiceovers.) "'Cubicle' is unreal, just blips, a beat, some clanging guitar chords, and then the payoff spit — "Spend all your time ... in a little cubicle." It claims to be your salvation from cubicle death, but it lies, and Rinôçerôse lies with it. Because aside from a few facsimiles of the hit most of Rinôçerôse is just Dimitri From Paris without the fancy moustache." ................................ I heard Sufjan Stevens cooing from the PA in a Meijer last week. It was somehow elegaic. JTL]]> tag:johnny.gloriousnoise.com,2006://8.5265 2006-04-12T22:27:13Z 2008-10-08T21:10:57Z

Saturday night, 1:20am, over by the steps: “Who’s that guy over there?” “Oh, he’s Klein’s friend.” “What’s his story?” “Well, I heard a drove a freelance party wagon for awhile, but then he had to pull it into the roundhouse...

Johnny Loftus Saturday night, 1:20am, over by the steps: “Who’s that guy over there?” “Oh, he’s Klein’s friend.” “What’s his story?” “Well, I heard a drove a freelance party wagon for awhile, but then he had to pull it into the roundhouse for service. And now – oh my god, you’re not even going to believe it – he’s actually become more of a cliché. Not only is he an editor at some alt weekly, but he drives a 240 wagon AND has a beard. Seriously, what a hack. I mean shit, he thinks Johanna is foxy. How cool can he be?” “He looks like a Caucasian, bearded actor whose name escapes me.” ............ Links: The Heartless Bastards. Bedouin Soundclash. Loose Fur, Born Again in the USA Ruthann Friedman, Constant Companion ....... "Coney Island High," starring Uncle Grambo. ...................... From now on, Nate Dogg will dictate these blog entries. JTL]]>